I hardly post photos of myself in blogs and stuff, cause I’m just.. insecure? There I said it. Idk but I just needed this confidence boost once again yknow. I was webcamming with K (which I’m gonna strangle later) and being the smartass, printscreened that. For some reason, I feel that I looked happy there. I’ve never taken any happy photos for like.. the longest time ever. I just don’t really like to take pictures, just not me. Hah. Okay there you go. A picture of me trying to stop the conversation (obviously failed).

Pouring out there, chilly wind breeze. It be perfect with a cup of starbucks in hand. Can't leave in time before the rain hits. Well.. I guess home is great too, except the fact that I can't focus on my OS notes, but on Femmething, tumblr & Burberry. Sinful slacky nature of mine. Ha.

Off to meet L. Later.

I've been on tumblr alot.
So here might be dead kthx.
:)

because ordinary is just not good enough.



Heavy is the mind that can’t be told
When its time to let it go

Heavy is the heart filled so full with sorrow

Worry cant help a single thing but
When we’re out of our heads
At least were out in the open

The warning signs of a troubled mind
It’s all the things we can’t see and can’t hide

But when you kiss me in ways I’ve forgotten,
Love is a swimming pool with no bottom
We’ve got to hold on the water is rising

And all we ever want is to be loved
Whether sun or stars above
All our trouble all our toil
Is towards no greater earthly goal

So never mind what logic says I say
logic a guy who outta empty his pockets
All we want is an open mind you know the
Kind you can earn and can’t buy

And when you kiss me in ways I’ve forgotten,
Love is a swimming pool with no bottom
We’ve got to hold on the water is rising

Everyone spends a little time
Fighting the drift back out to the deep end
When I asked you to throw me a line
Thats when you pulled me out by the heart strings

We thought the weight of the world would have us sinking like a stone
If we should ever lose our hold
But we rise to the surface the moment
That we know theres nothing to fear down below

When you kiss me in ways I’ve forgotten,
Love is a swimming pool with no bottom
We’ve got to hold on the water is rising


dreams.

I just realised,
Yes my blog has been emo.
I found it quite a joke, the fact that I'm against emo. Allow me to clear my name. I'm not emo emo, I don't hate myself. I just have fairly serious (I won't usually claim that, so be glad) body image problem. I think I'm fat, allow me to do this for like.. 2more weeks. I just HAVE TO get to this satisfactory look/weight/measurements, I don't have eating disorders. I'm on healthy diet I promise, it's wholemeal. I don't starve myself. I just binge too often, therefore it's the binging I have to stop, not my normal meals. So I'm not emo k thx :)


Should I try the Doc Martens look? It's really lovely, but not sure whether I can pull it off. Suggestions?

Hate it when my posts are full of 'I', I like my blog when it was.. ambiguous and vague.
Promise myself to go back that way.
Pray for me huns :)

I know I'm going to disappoint those who love and care about me. But I really really can't stand myself being so chubby. I want to look lovely like this.

Going to sign up for driving lessons.
Anybody?

Frankly, I think I'm going to be single and alone for the rest of my lives till I die.
I'm never going to meet the love of my life.
Ain't that nice?


I just freaking gobbled down 5 BBQ chicken wings @ 11pm! Don't I know what's that going to do to my body. I'm not just doing that to be skinny, but my stomach has a problem with food after 8pm. It'll start to ache.

Meals for the next 3 days to get back into shape.
Wednesday - *$ @Noon, Dinner @ Aunt's
Thursday - *$ @ Noon, Dinner
Friday - Lunch @IKEA, Bread for Dinner